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Honey Boo Boo, 7, Worries She’s Too “Chunky” to Compete in Beauty Pageant

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Honey Boo Boo Child aka Alana Thompson

Alana “Honey Boo Boo” Thompson has long wowed audiences during her time as a pageant princess on TLC’s Toddlers & Tiaras, but on Wednesday’s season finale of her spinoff, Here Comes Honey Boo Boo, the precocious 7-year-old had to be coaxed to even get on stage.

“Mama, I think I’m a little chunky today,” Honey Boo Boo moaned at Georgia’s Miss Sparkle and Shine Pageant as June Shannon and other handlers helped suit her up in her new pink frock. “You have to stay away from those chicken nuggets,” her mother replied, as both worried that the velcro keeping Honey Boo Boo’s ill-fitting dress together would come apart on stage.

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Reasoned one of Honey Boo Boo’s sisters prior to her performance: “Alana’s not your average pageant person. Most of the girls are like twigs. She’s more of a log. . . or a boulder.”

Later, once Honey Boo Boo summoned her internal “chicken nugget power” and took the stage to show off her new dress — and false teeth “flipper” — all her pre-show worry was forgotten. “Once she gets into pageant mode she becomes a different child,” Shannon beamed from the audience, where she sat alongside her daughters, partner Mike “Sugar Bear” Thompson and his brother, Lee, whom Honey Boo Boo dubbed “Uncle Poodle.”

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Though she missed out on the pageant’s Ultimate Grand Supreme title, Honey Boo Boo was awarded the People’s Choice prize — and was surprised with a visit from her beloved former pet pig, Glitzy! “I’m the people’s favorite! I think I did my best ever!” Honey Boo Boo said after her win, confirming that “[she’s] the Grand Supreme of my family!”

Honey Boo Boo’s family welcomed a new addition on Wednesday’s finale, when her sister, Anna (aka “Chickadee”) finally gave birth to baby Kaitlyn. “I’m so excited I’m about to piss all over myself,” Honey Boo Boo said before Anna brought her new baby home. Honey Boo Boo’s eloquent first impression of her niece: “Baby Kaitlyn is so tiny . . . I POOP BIGGER!”

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Though Sugar Bear reasoned that one of baby Kaitlyn’s hands — that has two thumbs — reminded him of a “Swiss army knife,” his daughter Honey Boo Boo looked on the bright side. “I wish I had an extra finger, then I could grab more cheese balls!” she said.

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