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‘Counting On’ Sneak Peek: Jessa Duggar and Ben Seewald Open Up About Overcoming Their Past Sins (Exclusive)

Taking time to reflect. Jessa Seewald (neé Duggar) and Ben Seewald came together with many other members of the Duggar family for a bible study in the upcoming Easter special.

Related: Duggar Family Pics: Couples, Babies and More!

In Us Weekly‘s exclusive sneak peek of the special, Counting Now: A New Life, Ben, 25, opens up about when he came to know the Lord.

“Well, as a teenager, I had a lot of struggles of consciousness just growing up, struggling with guilt and things [and] knowing that I wasn’t the person that I should be,” he explains. “I’d done things that I shouldn’t have done. About the time I was 15, I just remember hearing about what Jesus had done on the cross and how He died for our sins, He did everything that was necessary for me to be saved. ”

Jessa Duggar and Ben Seewald Open Up About Past Sins
Ben Seewald and Jessa Duggar TLC

Ben says “it was like springtime in my soul” when he began realizing these things. “I love springtime, because as the flowers are starting to bloom and you see, like, those first daffodils, you’re like, spring is coming,” he adds. “There’s still going to be some cold days, but we have hope that we’re gonna see green leaves on the trees again. Not everything’s going to be gray forever.”

Related: The Duggars: A Comprehensive Guide to the Famous Family

Jessa, 28, then shares her story, revealing she knew she wanted to go to heaven from a young age, but “there wasn’t really an awareness of my sin.”

In her confessional, Jessa, who announced in February she is expecting baby No. 4 with Ben, explains that she thought a lot about “eternity” when she was 12 and wasn’t happy with where she was at overall.

“I was a difficult person to be around. I was contentious, I was selfish and self-centered, and I was coming to a place where I was not content with staying that way,” she shares. “I wanted to see a change in my life.”

Related: Duggar Family: Meet the Next Generation

After seeing her siblings lean into their faith, Jessa began connecting with God more, she tells the group.

“I remember praying again and acknowledging my sin before God and the repenting of that and seeing a big change in my life,” she says before turning to her mother, Michelle Duggar. “Patience as a parent is something I pray for more and more, I say, ‘Please, I pray for the patience of my mother.'”

Jessa and Ben wed in November 2015 and share sons Spurgeon, 5, Henry, 4, and daughter Ivy, 22 months. Ben notes that they’ve had “difficult moments” as young parents and they sometimes get overwhelmed by it. In his confessional, he states, “Sometimes you feel like you want to pull your hair out!”

Counting Now: A New Life airs on TLC Tuesday, March 30, at 10 p.m. ET. It will also stream on discovery+.

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