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Troian Bellisario Opens Up About Mom Guilt 4 Months After Giving Birth: ‘I’m Somebody Who Needs to Work’

Making motherhood work! After she welcomed her daughter in October 2019, Troian Bellisario opened up about being present for her baby girl, while still making time for herself.

Troian Bellisario Opens Up About Mom Guilt 4 Months After Giving Birth: ‘I’m Somebody Who Needs to Work’
Troian Bellisario attends the premiere of Magnolia Pictures’ “Lucky” at Linwood Dunn Theater on September 26, 2017 in Los Angeles, California. Greg Doherty/Getty Images

Related: Celebrity Babies of 2019

“I want to be there for [my daughter] all the time, but that’s not possible,” the Pretty Little Liars alum, 33, admitted on a Monday, February 4, episode of Katie Lowes‘ “Katie’s Crib” podcast. “I become an empty well because I’m somebody who needs to work. I love working, I love being creative, and I want her to see that.”

She added: “I find that if I don’t fill up my creativity well, even if it’s meditation or exercise or I go get coffee with my writing partners … then I return to her, and I don’t have anything to give her. If I feel good and I’m fulfilled, I want to engage with her.”

The actress and her husband, Patrick J. Adams, tied the knot in 2016 and expanded their family two years later. Although Bellisario felt “love [and] adoration” for her daughter “overwhelmingly early on,” the Los Angeles native was nervous when she found out that they weren’t expecting a boy.

Related: Just Like Us: Celebrity Moms

“I was worried,” she admitted. “I was thinking about my relationship with my mother, my history with an eating disorder. My imaginings of a girl are so, ‘You’re gonna hate me.’”

For now, the new mom is busy taking care of her 4-month-old, comparing herself to kids who cry because they are “just so tired.”

To combat all of the exhaustion, she has started meditating while she breast-feeds. “If I put my phone down … breast-feeding is almost a type of meditation because I don’t know when it’s going to be done,” she said. “I just have to sit there and engage with her or not and breathe until she’s done.”

Related: Celeb Moms Share Breast-Feeding Pictures

The director is also focusing on just one child at a time. “I don’t feel rushed,” she said during the podcast. “I think it’s awesome when siblings are super close together, but I never had that.”

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